Sipping On Truth Elixer

It has come to my attention by my  daughters that I do not keep it real on my blog. Everything you see is real but at an edited version of myself. It's that small girl wanting to be polite and lovely so people will like her. Seriously at 37 I still can't get over that nice Holly image I throw out there. Don't get me wrong I can be as sweet as pie when I want to. So I'm going to lay down some truths and it will reveal how real my blog will be from now on.

1.  I live in the Ghetto, it has been referred to as the deepest part of hell. Traveling to the coast is a great relief to get the family out of the hood and into a different scenery for awhile. My yard is nice but a few streets over are hookers, tweaks and lost teenagers trying to figure out life in all the wrong ways. My sons high school is straight out of Freedom Riders and Dangerous Minds. We would move if we could but money is the obstacle that holds us back.

2.  I cuss, even at my kids. Anger and  my over all chalingo has me saying some pretty colorful phrases that makes squeaky clean Moms break their necks in Walmart lines and shoot me the death stare  ( don't ever try to patronize a witch with you glare honeys you don't want me to look into yours). Bumping gangsta rap while dropping off kids at school is common. Tupac is my favorite poet.

3.  I'm a medical marijuana patient. Bipolar depression and  nerve damage due to TIA strokes has me finding holistic relief with CBD & THC. Now that is what I call reefer madness. I do get some shit about this from people but my kids are relieved that their Mom can have a drop of oil or an edible that will take me from wanting to no longer be on earth to being a compassionate functional parent. Worry not I am responsible with this and will suffer through the day with pain until I know I won't have to drive someone somewhere.

4.  Can you come out and play? Most time it's a no, I'm an introvert. I've missed out on many family functions and don't visit friends, but sometimes I just cannot go out of the house or be around people. Phone conversations are hard. In public I will not speak until spoken to and with my perky nose this has people thinking I'm stuck up!

5.  Oh the wrath that happens if you put the dishes away other than there designated spots or the towels aren't hung straight. That's right I have the affliction of O.C.D. The house is usually tidy and if I get an unexpected visitor this throws me into panic mode.

 So now you know Gypsy Spirit Rising isn't all sunshine and rainbows, and everyday is a struggle one way or another. I'm awakening in all aspects of my life and the rawness of what it's really like from my end of things is something that doesn't need to be tucked away and hidden as if it's an ugly shame. I'm unapologetic because my humanness is showing.

"Capturing Peace"

P.S. Sipping on truth elixer is a metaphor not a drinking reference, that is one demon I have been able to conquer.

Powwow with My Inner Guide

Today I was drawn  into a meditation by Dr. Mary Pritchard during the Soul Driven Success Summit. After my meditation I decided to write about my experience. Music helps my brain in numerous ways so I went to seek some tunes to set the tone. I was shocked to hear new music on Pandora I hadn't heard before and was even more amazed that the symbol I received in my meditation was also on the album cover. Coincidence.....I think not.The meditation guides you to take deep breaths and mentally travel to the warm heart centered place were your Goddess, spirit guide, or higher self resides. So here is the story of my recent travel.

As I slowly tiptoe to the warm glow that is awaiting me in the teepee, I stop and stare up at the full moon and appreciate the glow that illuminates my flesh. The breeze whispers "woman who glows in the dark". Inside the teepee Spider Woman waits for me to join here around the fire. Spider Woman has been with me since I was 2 years old, and visit me in all stages of maiden, mother, and crone. Once I enter the teepee the flames ignite and burn brighter than before. Now is the time of asking. "What is my purpose here on earth", I ask because I'm still trying to figure out my soul mission. "You already know", she hisses and stares so deep into my eyes that a warm buzzing is felt in my brain and heart. The flames die down and then comes the smoke. In the smoke is a symbol that looks like a v with horns coming from the middle.

Coming out of the meditation I was confused with what this symbol represents. First google searches had me confused. I went next to Pinterest and typed in symbols with a description and boom it popped right up! Now let me tell you what brings the light to my eyes and what brings me joy. I love to work with earth, create, and heal! So now as I reveal the sigil to you it shall give you a glimpse of what is to come in this new year.

Side Note: Due to my bipolar depression I have been experiencing many dark nights of the soul. I have been in slumber rest mode since Christmas but believe I'm waking up again and moving forward. Love and light to all who know exactly what this means.